A sailor has died aboard the USS Essex. We have not been told details. Only he has died as a result of an accident during a system test.
I am surprised by the reaction of the base as a whole. It seems that each family has lost a loved one. I am familiar with those who sympathize for the loss. Here it seems they share the grief as it were their own. I have seen many wives crying for it. Even Lt is solemn.
I have not felt this way. I believe myself to be a kind person. I do not believe myself incapable of feeling as these others are for someone who is not my family or friend.
I believe I have not experienced this emotion is because I have not been a Navy wife long. I sympathize with the family for their loss to be sure. But I have not experienced the Navy to its fullest. I have not endured deployment or under way as others have. Aside from the uniforms and location, nothing has changed for my life with Lt. I have only needed to rely on him. He is my family here.
When I see the others crying or at the least showing some grief for this loss, I feel guilty for not doing so. I am unable to mount a convincing appearance of it.
I know I sound as I do not care. I do care. I am only unsure how to feel what would be appropriate.
You have not been in this situation long, so you do not "feel" the same loss as others do. This is normal, and will adjust itself as you get more involved with the people and the service. There is no "right" way to feel. You feel as you must at this point. You will get closer to the people, and will learn that closeness that service people have due to fear, loneliness, and loss. Just be supportive, serious, and kind, and those things will serve you well. You will adjust, and may never emote as others do. Don't worry about it..Just help where you can, and be yourself.
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