I have neglected this blog.
New marriage has filled my time and I have refused to share it. I think perhaps it is not unheard of that I have focused my attentions to my Coastie first, then to my work. It has left little time for other things.
Now I have discovered my Coastie desires time with me that involves only my presence. Nothing physical. It was a disturbing discovery at the start. He has lost interest already? I believe teary eyes convinced him I did not understand.
It took him some time to explain to me of this desire. He said it is not a loss of interest. He only wishes time to "stop vibrating." With much explanation, I have come to understand this as "violin time" for me. It is time in which I may arrange my thoughts for the day and put them away.
I must confess my feelings of guilt for having been teary eyed. The bewilderment and panic in his eyes only caused me to tear more for having caused this because I assumed the worst rather than ask what he meant. It is wrong of me but I also confess contentment to know my tears can cause such a reaction. It is comforting to know he concerns himself with my feelings.
I insist this does not become my habit. I will question what I do not understand before allowing emotion to rule.
It is great to see you blogging again! I've missed you and have often thought about how you and your Coastie were doing. I felt assured that all was well--but it is nice to see that all is indeed as it should be. Your love for him is endearing to see. :)
ReplyDeleteMuch continued happiness to you and Coastie.
Kat
It seems you and your husband are growing closer and gaining understanding about each other. That's great!
ReplyDeleteAs for your return, I second Kat's sentiment. It's a relief to be able to read your posts again.
it's good to see you return :)
ReplyDelete