I know that for my children, growing up is inevitable. I know there will be questions. I know some will be awkward and given Jared’s job, I should be prepared to face those questions myself. I also know that in today’s world, those questions will come sooner rather than later. The first solo awkward question to face came for me last night. Jared got to explain Chao lei's choice of words concerning “what gets me off.” In truth, I would have preferred to face that one on my own.
At dinner, we were having a pleasant conversation, discussing how school went for them and how their activities were going. Then it happened. Chao lei asked his question. “Mom, what is rape?” I sat there stunned at such a question. I had great difficulty swallowing my soup. The expression on my face must have been something to see since June’s expression indicated she was nearly ready to run.
After I choked down my soup, I told him we would discuss it later when June was not in the room. I think it was more to give me time to get over the shock of the question and just how nonchalantly Chao lei had asked it… and to delay long enough for me to formulate an appropriate answer. In the meantime, in my mind of course, I was swearing profusely at his father for not being there for this one and formulating my response.
I am not fond of when people use “um” as a filler while thinking of what to say next. In spite of myself, I found myself using “um” quite frequently. I am not sure he fully understands the subject matter. I did tell him if he has further questions of this, he should WAIT FOR HIS FATHER TO RETURN AND ASK HIM!
Does that make me a bad mother or only a coward?
I don't think it makes you a coward OR a bad mother! My kids constantly ask me questions I don't know how to answer! It's so hard! You're doing great.
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